New Year Resolution Ideas

In a few days, week, month, year and a decade will change.  And I’m sure you want to change too. But if you are anything like me, you’ll find that there are so many ways one can think of improving self that it gets difficult to decide. Worry not, for here are some easy, doable New Year resolution ideas for the coming year.

Start cooking more at home
Over the years, researches have pointed out the surprising benefits of home-cooked meals. It has been scientifically proven that those who eat home- made food regularly are happier and healthier. Their food-eating time has fewer distractions and lesser chances of shifting to sugar-loaded and processed foods, which involuntarily increases body mass and unhealthy weight.

Travel
Travelling opens our eyes to new ideas, cultures and places. In a year, plan to take at least three vacations – two thrifty ones and one to explore little luxuries of life. For the first one, delve into the neighbourhood on foot. Visit than new place that has opened recently, plan a picnic in a garden, visit a fort, go to a farmer’s market – anything you haven’t done in the last one year and take a moment to savour the beauty around. For the second vacation, plan it to a destination that is about a few hours away. To make the trip interesting, travel in a train. See the great countryside along with beautiful fields growing out the seasonal crops. And take one holiday to go somewhere far – a different country or the edge of your own. Make that trip luxurious. 

Volunteer weekly
Though I’d love to write “daily”, it is not something that I am able to do myself so avoiding to preach about it. We all are blessed in our own unique ways. Volunteering helps us to give back and if your acts of kindness make about an iota of difference in someone’s life, I say you should grab that chance.

Maintain a balance between what you think, speak and do
Our mind thinks about 20,000 thoughts a day, very little of which are useful and most are waste. Change that. Think only what you need to do, speak only when you need to and do what you speak/preach. Don’t let the mind wander. Here are some simple ways to do that. 

Meditate daily
Meditation is a spiritual experience. If done right, it can open your own mind in ways you did not know was possible. Living a happy life is practical meditation in action. 

Sleep on time
Did you know lack of sleep costs about $411 billion in lost productivity across United States? A Fortune study reveals that a shockingly high number of people lead in unhealthy sleeping habits meaning they are either sleeping less or not getting the sound sleep. If you are one of those night owls who feels the night brings out the best in you, perhaps the coming year is a good opportunity to retrospect and change that habit for good.

Be a WOW
You are not far away from meeting your own WOW version. Promise to be a better person, learn something new every Sunday and follow it up the entire week. In 52 weeks, you would definitely better than from where you started.

Go sugar free
Celebrate sugar-free week every month. That means no soda, chocolates, cakes, sweets, Indian mithais, bread, cereals, salad dressings – sugar has surprising ways of finding itself in your meals. This year, you can make a resolution to reduce your consumption of sugar and in turn be a step closer to good health.


Other than the first one, all the New Year resolutions are my personal ones. I hope at some level, you’ll also find a way to connect with them. If there are any that you’d like to share, give me a shout out in the comments section below and I’d love to read.

Thank you for your time.
God Bless.
N

Anger Is Deadly

A close family member of mine gets so mad that he starts smashing things. His rage blinds him by insecurity and anger. At some point, it doesn’t matter who is right or wrong. His trembling voice poisons his mind beyond his own control and things get ugly. What follows is bad mood for days, turning of frustrations inward, leading to more abuse or deliberate self-harm. 

A lot of people don’t realize their anger is destructive. It intensifies with time due to the trigger points that make it more uncontrollable. 

Anger is unnatural

Human body is made to feel the experiences around us. The beauty of nature, little moments of joy, vast horizons of talents, incredible gifts of the Almighty, sweetness of relationships, warmness of compassion – the list is endless. Anger blinds us from these and takes us to the dark world inside where the mind starts to justify offensive behaviour. 

Seeds of this poison work their way out in the form of jealousy, hatred, unhealthy comparisons, ego, and loathing of others. As these emotions consume a person’s mind, the body starts to react. We develop certain behavioural aspects that become a part of our personality. For example, we begin to ignore/not give importance to others’ opinions, try to impose our view point or simply give a death stare to show our displeasure.


Effects of anger
From higher anxiety levels to change in the basic DNA – anger is more deadly that you can imagine. Experts suggest that anger has become so common that an average person feels its wrath about once a day and gets annoyed about thrice a day. 

About 45% of adults regularly lose their calm at their workplace, whereas 38% feel unhappy at work. More than one third of the world population suffers from anxiety or depression, which have become the largest causes of long-term sickness. More of these statistics can be read here at Mind Your Anger.
  

Anger Management
A lot has been said about anger management. Other than stress management, it is perhaps the most requested topic for discussion during my meditation workshops. Though people are generally aware about their anger and want to actively use anger management in their lives, their own personality restricts them sometimes. 

Anger management aims to reduce these very issues. It encourages acceptance towards emotional variations and physiological reasons that provoke anger. You can’t control external circumstances, nor can you put a stop to others’ habits, but you can control your reaction to it. There’s a complete post written on anger management of this blog which you can access here. 

Mindful Meditation

Once Buddha came to speak at his sermon carrying a satin cloth in his hands. He asked people what they saw, to which everyone replied in unison that it was a beautiful satin cloth. Then Buddha started tying knots to it. After putting about five of them, he asked people whether it was the same cloth. People confirmed it was, though it was little

different now because it had knots.

To this, Buddha replied that it was what he wanted them to understand. 

“You miss seeing the fine satin fiber lines because you are in knots.” 

Mindfulness meditation teaches you to be the same cloth but without knots. He then asked the best way to open them, and if pulling the cloth from both sides would help the purpose. People replied that it wasn’t the correct way as it would in fact tighten the knots. 

Acknowledging that, Buddha told them that even though most know it wouldn’t help, they still try to open their knots by pulling! He added that while the intention of an individual to overcome difficulties can be termed as good, the mean adopted to do it is not always the right one. In confusion of solving out something, most make it complicated. 

“If you want to open the bumps, close your mind to disturbances, and untie them with caution.”

What is Mindfulness Meditation?
Mindfulness meditation is being in present. It means doing the current work with utmost clarity, patience and dedication. It is not a condition to be achieved, but a way of living. For example, if you are eating, being a mindful eater would mean that you are aware of how much to eat and stop when your stomach feels full. Mindfulness meditation makes you aware of your body, thoughts and surroundings. 

According to the statistics listed on this website, mindfulness meditation improves anxiety levels 60% of the time. The same site lists reduction of risk of being hospitalized for coronary disease by 87%, relief in the symptoms of insomnia by 75% of the time, increase in productivity by 120% and reduction in PMS symptoms by 57% as some of the direct effects of mindfulness meditation. 

Mindfulness Meditation Exercises
Most people think of meditation as a daunting task, because it is only when they sit in silence they realize clutter in mind. These are the random thoughts that go on, without necessarily having any connection with the present reality. Mindfulness meditation encourages to accept them and move beyond. Since body and environment influence thoughts and our reality, mindfulness teaches us to be kind and convert our clutter into something meaningful and loving. If you want to know some techniques for it, read on:

1. Sit quiet and observe: For about 10 minutes every day, keep everything aside. Put your smartphone at a place where it can not disturb you and observe the little movements of nature around you. Ants, birds, leaves, wind, smell of soil, chirping of birds, noise of a dog bark, smell of cooking, sound of a car engine, blast of sunlight, ripples of water, colourfulness of flowers – there are many things that happen simultaneously around us. Find your centre and notice the comfort of sitting still.
2. Put positivity in practice: Sweet words, like flowers, are essence of our innate nature. Speak slowly, but speak positively and if you want to learn positive thinking, read this. 
3. List the details: Anytime, anywhere – list at least 10 details of a place/moment/incident that you would not have otherwise noticed. 
4. Say no to multitasking: Doing more than one chore at a time wastes more time. Do a task fully before moving on to another one. You mind would want to jump, but resist the temptation of leaving something in between. Don’t let your mobile phone break your cycle. 
5. Develop 2/60 cycle: Spend every 2 minutes of an hour to embrace silence, mentally getting ready for the next one hour. Use mindfulness to give your mind some time to shift its wavelength one from task to another. 

Benefits of Mindfulness Meditation

Clear mind: When you learn to control your thoughts and stay in the present, the mind stops wandering. It moves away from the buts and ifs, and stays where you want it to be. The calming effect increases concentration and reduces the chances of immoral behaviour. 

Happiness becomes a choice: As I wrote earlier, recognising the importance of current time is bliss. Read a small story about it.

Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction

Like anything you read? Want to experience meditation? I am one crazy-about-meditation kind of person who likes to experiment it as much as I can. Give me a shout & I’d love to share! 

Love,

Nitima

Email: Sood(dot)nitima(at the rate)gmail(dot)com 

7 Step Plan to Sleep Right

Is there a way to get food sleep? What makes the body sleepy? Thoughts? Actions? Worries? 

For long, I have struggled to find the right balance between daily schedule and sleeping on time. My next day depends on a good night sleep. No good sleep, no high energy the next day. I have a ritual. I follow it everyday, and on the rare days i don't, the guilt of breaking the discipline makes it hard to concentrate on anything else. So here's my 7 step sleeping plan and I hope it helps you as much as it helps me. 

How to sleep right Step 1: 

Workout: Run, jog, walk, do yoga, aerobics, zumba, boxing, learn martial arts, pick weights or participate in strength training - do something everyday without fail. Exercise brings a natural rthym to body. It releases good harmones, encourages flexibily of muscles and makes sure the blood flow is better, not to mention tires the body so that it can get a good sleep. 

How to sleep right Step 2: Have early dinner. Most Indians aren't used to eating by 6:00 pm, but hey - if the rishi munis could do it, so can we. Early dinner allows the food to be digested long before you hit the sack. 

How to sleep right Step 3: Drink warm milk after food. I am a staunch believer of burning calories before going off to sleep and so can never advice anyone to drink milk right before sleeping. I suggest have it at least an hour before so that your body can break it down before it goes in rest. 

How to sleep right Step 4: Walk or stand of your feet for at least 45 minutes after dinner. Give a chance to your body to start the digestion process. I do so while watching evening news. I put a timer of an hour on my watch and continue to stand and/or shift weight between both legs for that time. I also do 10 squats and lunges in between. It's entirely on choice. You can decide not to do it. 

How to sleep right Step 5: Shut down tv/loud music/laptop/otjer screens at least 2 hours before. Give your mind sometime to get back to its original thoughts. Bring it to peace. You don't need to go to sleep thinking about all that's wrong with the world. Deal with it the next day. 

How to sleep right Step 6: Write. It helps to pen thoughts, empties the mind and soothes the nerves. 

How to sleep right Step 7: Meditate. One of the most powerful tools to audit your day's actions and then shutting the entire system of body one by one. It's easy once you build the practice of it. 

That's it. That's what I do, every night. You can try too and how this 7 step routine for a better sleep works out for you, let me know. 

Till then, 

Goodnight. 

N

How to Let Go

Have you ever had the feeling that you missed someone so much, you didn't want to get up from bed. When thoughts of someone meet you smile and cry. When you wanted to go back in time and spend more days with that special person. When someone broke your heart, but you still find it difficult let them go. Letting go is the final stage of grieving over someone, weather dead or alive. Letting go allows you to give up the pain that you have held for long. In some cases, it means accepting the truth that a person or the things that you have been so compassionate about is no longer there. It means confronting your unpleasant emotions about the past and becoming comfortable with them. If you find it difficult to let go, here are 10 tips to help you. How to let go:

• How To Let Go 1: Deal with people, one day at a time. Because when things don't go according to you, you have got to learn to deal with everything – one person a time.
• How To Let Go 2: Give space to your loved ones in relationships. Most relationships fail because we expect too much in return. When you lower your expectations and give space to others, they will love you more.
• How To Let Go 3: Do not limit yourself. Some people like to keep the situations hanging. Their belief system that they can’t do anything or it is not right to interfere keeps them miserable. Challenge yourself. The only thing that limits you is your imagination.
• How To Let Go 4: Do not worry too much. Whatever will be will be. Excessive thinking about something doesn't make it easy to let go.
• How To Let Go 5: Accept people for what they are and not how you want them to be. Keep room for mistakes. We are human beings. The being part in us lifelong learner. Allow it to learn.
• How To Let Go 6: Learn to forgive: unless you forgive yourself and the situation, you cannot move forward. Letting go is all about learning. Forget the hurt, but take a lesson from it. If you dream of flying high, you have got to learn how to leave the earth.
• How To Let Go 7: Be strong: Some of us think that holding grudges makes us stronger, it gives us some kind of power. Whether it is guilt, anger, frustration, betrayal letting go is never easy. Never fight to hold on, fight to let it go.
• How To Let Go 8: Give up unneeded stress: You have to understand that people come and people go. This is life. It becomes easy when you let go of the unwanted stress. Stop   holding  those  who have let you go a long time back.
• How To Let Go 9: Value yourself: Sometimes  we  have spent time with someone for so long  that we do not even realise  that is stopped valuing us time back.  The person  who doesn't value you blocks you from the one who  might.  Let them go.
• How To Let Go 10: Be Happy: When you  let go,  you put your trust in  God,  allowing Him to  heal your wounds  and something magical happen.  God works in mysterious ways,  give him room.                                                     

How to Manage Anger?

Imagine a  life where there is no anger,  no frustration  or irritation.  Imagine a life  in which you are calm, happy and contended.  Now imagine  that life has already started. What makes us stop from  feeling good ? Are the circumstances always exterior or can you control some part of them?   For most of us,  anger drives us into  territories which cause regret.  Broken relationships,  grudges and feelings of resentment  are just one of the few ways   in which anger gets expressed.
So how do you manage something that has become such an integral part of your life?  How do you let go ?  I have researched and found some  Anger Management techniques  that may help.  You may take note of them try then what wine time you find the anger management  method that is perfect for you.

1. Manage Anger #1: Act, not react. This anger control tool emphasizes the importance of reducing the frequency of thoughts so that the individual gets enough time to pass that critical time period (usually seconds or minutes) without reacting.
2. Manage Anger #2 — Recognize your thoughts that cause stress. This anger management technique emphasizes the importance of understanding how stress underlies anger and how to reduce stress before it turns into anger. It helps to know what pushes your buttons and knowing your body’s anger signs. Stop and think! Decide what to do.
3. Manage Anger #3— Develop Empathy. Learn to see things from other person’s perspective. Every individual being has his or her energy center and a set of habits/way to react. This anger management technique focuses on the relationship between empathy and anger control and how one can reduce his/her anger by learning how to see things from the perspective of others.
4. Manage Anger #4 — Converse with yourself. Learn to talk to self, defeat negative self-talk. Give yourself titles that empower you to deal with anger more effectively.
5. Manage Anger #5— Adjust Expectations. Anger is often triggered by a discrepancy between what we expect and what we get.  Learning to adjust those expectations—sometimes upward and other times downward—can help us cope with difficult situations or people or even cope with ourselves. Accept yourself/others as they are.
6. Manage Anger #6 — Forgive. Let Go!  Resentment is a form of anger that does more damage to the holder than the offender.  Making a decision to “let go” (while still protecting ourselves) is often a process of forgiveness—or at least acceptance—and a major step toward anger control. Don’t hold on to your anger. Find ways to let it go. Talk about hurt and angry feelings. Look for someone to discuss your anger.
7. Manage Anger #7 — Move away physically.  This anger control technique consists of removing yourself from the situation and taking a temporary “time-out” while sticking to some basic rules that are described.

Does this work for you? Do you have  something that you would like to add to this list?  Please comment below and I will be happy to make your suggestions a part of my life too.